Two Actions - To Deal With A Drifting Relationship

There are two specific actions you can take to break that too-familiar communication and emotional pattern of drifting from closeness and sliding into a criticizing/blaming/defensive mode:

•  Get in the face of your partner - not with anger or accusations but with statements of appreciation and affection. But watch out - they better be sincere or you'll loose any and all credibility. You need to literally get in their face for your words to be heard and believed. When drifting occurs a credibility gap develops and affection and support need to be said in a deliberate and up-close manner.

• Your talk has to be very specific and with the right tone of voice! It doesn't matter if you're announcing a trip to the store or expressing your appreciation about something. You have to spell it out - so there is no chance of misinterpretation or of assumptions being made about what you really meant. Think of your partner as being six years old - no matter how smart or how much education he has. Be specific!

This is what it takes if you really want to shift the emotional tone and direction of things between you. If this feels realistic to you then it's not too late. But you have to really be aware and do it every hour of every day. Give it your best shot!
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